The abuser may appear charming and charismatic to other people, and may have been that way with you early on in your relationship, before the abuse started. They typically display a different side of their personality when other people are around and this enables them to successfully disguise their abusive behaviour with you.

This change in their personality may make you feel very confused and lead you to blame yourself for the things that are happening to you. You may begin to feel you deserve the abuse. Remember there is no excuse for the abuse, you do not need to endure it in any form. The impact of domestic abuse is likely to make you have little self confidence and very low self esteem. You may feel exhausted, isolated, trapped, degraded, frightened, depressed and desperate.

Always remember YOU ARE NOT ALONE and whether or not you feel able to leave the abuser there are things you can do to make yourself and your family safer.

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